This page is dedicated to Dorothy Dandridge - An American Beauty

Shake It Off

Let's face it, mean girls are not just in High Schools. My confidence and self esteem is in tack and I face the rumor board often. Rumors are designed to break down self esteem and confidence. Once this is understood, it is not hard to recognize the game and avoid a messy outcome.  Most of the time mean girls (including chatty men) are coworkers, church members and people in your personal life. 

Most women at some point in life have to face rumors, gossip and jeaslously.  The only defense for these personal attacks is to "Shake It Off".  Understanding your personal value and contribution to your personal development isn't easy but don't let this important task stop you from building a healthly sense of self. Keep in mind Dorothy didn't find her way back to Kansas by wishing the Emerald City it would just appear by tapping her heels three times.  She had to experience a complex journey to learn her importance, position in life and everything that really matters. 

It's important to understand the steps for dealing with damaging rumors.  If not handled correctly, rumors can ruin your reputation and follow you for years.  The good news is that most people know the rumors that is being spread about them so here are a few suggestions for dealing with the situation quickly.
  1. Consider who is starting and spreading the rumor and try to understand their motive.  This will assist with clearing your thoughts and not reacting in anger.
  2. Keep your composure and do not react with emotional out burst.  This will assist with helping everyone listening to the rumor to see you as the person you truly are and allow people to form their own point of view. 
  3. Don't try to correct the rumor by talking about it.  People love drama...don't provide it.
  4. If the rumor is true and you don't like what people are saying...straighten up your act.  Adults are free to make their own decisions.  Changing your behavior may draw attention away from the situation.  PLEASE keep in mind - everyone knows most rumors are not lies.

Do you have a reputation of using your sex appeal to get your way with the boys?  If so, you may want to consider if that is working for your personal and professional life. If you think it is working consider the secure it has on your future.  If the rumor bothers you consider toning down the attention you bring to the situation.  Lets be honest.  No women is respected for using what she has to get what she wants.  Women are respected for working hard to achieve goals...bottom line.

Please leave your story about dealing with rumors and gossip.
All comments are welcomed.


  1. I recently had something very simular happen to me at work. A certain person who works at a "Logistics" professional business was spreading a very hurtful and cruel rumor about me and when I first heard it I flipped. My first reaction was to confront the person, who was older than me, and put her "in her place." However, I did not. I actually decided against it and to be honest I wish I would have read up on this sooner because this might haven given me a better insight in to how to assest the situation. I simply told the supervisor and hoped that it was handle effecntly.

  2. @jsspald - Thank you for leaving a comment. Most of us can relate to your situation. I'm sure on this side of the coin you can tell you made the best decision. However its a huge struggle to make the right decision when you have a target on your back. BRAVO!! We all can learn from your example of class. Keep shinning.


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Star Sighting: Dororthy Dandridge

Star Sighting: Dororthy Dandridge
Beautiful Dorothy Dandridge with a group of Beauty Queens in the 1940s. Photo: Clyde Woods